Like most men (and a few women, too, I might add) I have had a long-standing love affair with the automobile. That is why I was so excited to see the Times-Union’s contest to pick the coolest American-made car ever. 

Lamar Thames

Not that there is any doubt about which car will win, is there? I mean, who wouldn’t vote for the 1957 Chevy Bel Air as the coolest car ever made anywhere? Its sleek lines and impeccably shaped fins seemed to perfectly capture the imagination of a young nation of automobile-lovers who were just starting to purchase vehicles because of how they looked, not how they ran.

I know because I was one of those who bought on looks rather than on performance. That is why, too, that my love-affair with the automobile could be better described as unrequited love.

I made careful choices but like many other parts of my life, I could never get it just right when buying a car. Take the first one I ever bought, for instance. It was 1964 and I was two years into a four-year enlistment in Uncle Sam’s military, stationed at Gunter Air Force Base in Montgomery, Ala.
I had saved a few bucks with an account at the base credit union and wanted to buy my first car.
A buddy of mine knew a guy who had a car for sale and I went to check it out. Well, it was a convertible, late 1950s model Chevy. I fell in love and agreed to buy the car on the spot (without even taking it to a mechanic to see if it was a sound investment. I know; it was a dumb move, but like I said, I fell in love with that car with its sleek lines and unusual fins.)

Photo by Douglas Wilkinson from www.Chevrolet-Archives.com

I know you are probably thinking that I was pretty smart to make my first car a 1957 Chevy Bel Air, right? If you were thinking that, you would be wrong. I chose a 1958 Chevy instead. Like I said, I always seemed to be a little off in my decision making back then. Besides, the ‘58 was cheaper than the ‘57, even back then.

Oh, the ‘58 was nice looking, too, but you didn’t see it in the Times-Union’s lineup of America’s coolest cars made in America, did you? And you won’t either. Primarily because I don’t think it was a very good car.
Mine developed a carburetor leak, never ran exactly right and left me stranded around 2 a.m. on a lonely stretch of highway southeast of Tallahassee once. I abandoned it and because I was wearing my uniform I was able to hitch a ride into Tampa, where I caught a bus to my parents house in Plant City.
Finally, that ‘58 caught fire one afternoon when my girlfriend (soon to be first wife) was driving it. Thankfully, a firefighter was riding behind her when it happened and he got her out of the car before she was hurt. But that was it for me. I sold that old thing for junk and was glad to get rid of it. I was disheartened a few weeks later, however, when I saw a buddy of mine driving it on base. He said the guy I sold it to repaired the damage from the fire, repainted it, repaired the upholstery and sold it to him for $400. I think my buddy kept that car for another three years.
See what I mean? I bought the wrong model car by one year, had bad luck with it from the start and sold it one repair too soon. Just my bad luck. I really missed that car, too.
I have had other clunkers, too, including these legendarily poor vehicles:
A 1960s Hillman Minx that had great looking leather seats but was woefully short of mechanical efficiency.
A 1968s Mercury Cougar that overheated, ruining the pistons. (A friend bought a ‘68 Camaro at the same time; his lasted about 20 years.)
A late 1970s Volkswagen Beetle that practically ran on air but wouldn’t start without a push. (I know; everyone had one of those, but mine was just one in a long line of junk cars. I once drove it from Lakeland to Panama City without turning it off once.)
An early 1970s Ford Pinto (remember, the car that was notorious for catching fire if someone rear-ended you.)
OK, gotta go now. I am going to submit a write-in vote for the 1958 Chevy Bel Air convertible in the Times-Union contest. At least it will get one vote.